DEAR DEIDRE: MY pregnant girlfriend is being evicted from her flat and has asked if she can move in with me.
While I love her with all my heart, the idea of taking on her and another man’s baby full-time is a lot to bear, and I don’t know what to do.
I’m 32, she’s 29, and we’ve been together for five months.
We were friends for years before we finally confessed our feelings to each other.
She’d just been through a tough break-up with the father of her child, and as I supported her through it, we grew closer.
She’s now seven months pregnant, and her landlord has given her a two-month notice to move out.
She’s distraught, and the stress of trying to find somewhere new is getting her down.
She’s asked me if I would mind her staying in my flat for a few months until she finds something else.
The problem is, it’s tiny, and I have one bedroom.
The last thing I want is to be a bad boyfriend, but the idea of taking care of a newborn and having no space for myself feels overwhelming.
She knows it’s a big ask, and while she’s not putting any pressure on me, I feel so guilty thinking about saying no.
As her boyfriend, I should be there to support her, but I’m not sure I can take this on.
DEIDRE SAYS: Looking after a newborn is no easy feat and can disturb every aspect of your life, so it’s understandable that you’re feeling reluctant about this.
While it’s clear you want to support your girlfriend, taking this step too soon, especially with the stress of a baby, could put your relationship under a lot of strain.
It would be best if you were honest with your girlfriend about your reluctance to move in together.
If she knows that it’s a big ask, I’m sure she’ll understand.
Instead, why not offer to help her find somewhere suitable.
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