Sittervising – a portmanteau of sitting and supervising – is a parenting “trend” that’s been gathering steam over the past few years.
The phrase was coined by Susie Allison, a former teacher and mum-of-three who runs the Busy Toddler. It refers to the act of “supervising [children] from a seated position”.
Sittervising might be more beneficial than you think
Allison said that sittervising is a “conscious decision” she’s made in her parenting and is “steeped in child development research, best practices, and a deep knowledge of pedagogy”.
The thought process is that adults interfere with, and change how, kids play. So by taking a step back and sitting somewhere else, while watching them from a safe distance, you’re helping them to boost their skills. She suggested these include: problem solving, risk management, communication skills, imagination, divergent thinking, and cooperation.
That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be playing with your kids at all – of course, not. As Allison wrote on her website: “Playing with kids is also a fantastic way to build a relationship with them (but far from the only way).
“But it’s important to recognise there are some skills that can’t develop fully if we are forever and always playing with them or forever and always right at their side on a playground.”
It’s also, let’s face it, a great tool for burned out parents who just need to sit and gather their thoughts for a moment, or enjoy that coffee while it’s hot.
Obviously if you’re going to be taking a backseat while your child plays, you need to make sure their environment is safe and that you’re still keeping an eye on them and not completely leaving them to their own devices.
It’s not ‘lazy parenting’
Mariah Maddox wrote for Motherly that “many may say that sittervising is simply just ‘lazy parenting’” but she argued that it’s “more of a conscious choice that is made to create benefits for both the parents and the child”.
Dr Samantha Rodman Whiten, known as Dr Psych Mom on social media, took to TikTok to share concerns over sittervising being considered a “trend” among parents, particularly mothers, arguing that we don’t need a trend to tell parents to sit down.
“It is no wonder that I see profound amounts of anxiety amongst mothers in my practice if this is considered a new trend where you’re bucking convention by being able to sit down,” she explained.
“No, you’re allowed to sit down. You are always allowed to sit down.”
In the caption for her video she wrote: “Sit as much as you want or can. You are a person too. It shouldn’t be a viral trend to sit down when you’re engaged in the tiring work of parenting.”
Personally, I think social media can make it seem like we should be doing things with our kids all the time and keeping them constantly busy – taking them to clubs, activities, events, you name it.
Anything that reminds us it’s OK to take a step back, not helicopter parent, and just be is surely a positive thing?
#Sittervising #Parenting #Trend
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